Here’s what’s incredible about writing in a journal my entire life – I can find big moments like prom and graduation…read myself back to life. This poem includes snippets from the entry I wrote the day after my prom. Grade 12. Age 18. Tonight, my daughter has her prom, some thirty years (and five days!) later. I pulled out my journal so I can read the entry to her. Show her a ‘me’ who lived through what she’s living through now. I found my end of high school grad entries too. Wild. Wild. Wild. The memories lift up like kites, stuttering in old winds…
Last night was my prom. (June 8, 1996)
The journal entry is proof of the lived experience. My loopy cursive like romantic blooms in a fresh bouquet. I’d cut my hair. Got my eyebrows waxed for the time: VIRGIN EYEBROW WAXER….a ‘quick, hot pain’. But this:
I felt like a movie star last night…all beautiful. I looked in the mirror and had to look again to stare at myself. I really looked ravishing. It’s odd those times…Last night I felt sleek, sexy, sophisticated and very confident with my appearance…
She’s still in me, this shy, uncertain beauty. Looking twice at her reflection, apprehensive, disbelieving…yet available for fleeting confidence.
Ivy Rose Motel
room 110, naked in the tub
teenage dreamland
VANESSA SHIELDS 