It’s beautiful how this time of year – the change in weather, and the quick to follow change in heartsong – brings me into myself. Of course, it’s also the time of year when I’m supposed to spread the love and be with people maybe more than any other time of year! To celebrate the birth of more than just a saviour born in a manger…but perhaps, the re-birth of the voices in my head and heart doing their best to save me from my self.
So I asked for guidance on ‘how to get through this busy, busy time’ – and the message said: Be Honest With Yourself.
You received this card as gentle confrontation because the angels know you’ve been hiding your true feelings.
You’ve probably been afraid that if you admitted how you honestly felt, you’d be overwhelmed with feelings and faced with making some necessary changes that you feel unprepared for.
…the angels remind you to focus only upon your desires and not upon your fears so that you can attract the former and not the latter.
It’s true. This year, having had a second book of poetry published, and a journey with my first ever book tour, I’ve found that I’ve slipped into the safety of making some decisions based on fear, not what I truly desire. And trust me, there were many hours on the shaky VIA train and in quiet coffee shops that I felt the weight of…well, waiting for my head to catch up to my heart. A girl has very, very large dreams. Always have. Always will. And a girl continues to learn the life lesson of how to deal with staying true to what I need on a creative-soul level and what scares me about giving myself these needs in ways that are motivated by trust and faith, not fear.
This is a reminder to me (and you?), that an honest relationship with yourself is undeniable and unavoidable. So as you settle deeper into warm jammies, cups of hot drinks, and the cushions and blankets on your sofa (not to mention the family and pets), give yourself time to reflect on the honest truth about who you are and what you need.
Maybe on your list to Santa, friends and family, what you need most is support to focus on your dreams. Maybe you need time to write your dreams out…and how to achieve them. Maybe you don’t need that giant bin of chocolate but something more holistic that will give you the feeling of fulfillment that lasts longer than the sugar shock to your system. (Don’t get rid of the chocolate, for goodness sake! Just focus on the joy it brings…!)
The loudest voice in my head these days is saying this:
THERE. IS. TOO. MUCH. TO. DO.
PLEASE SAY NO. AND LIVE IT. LIVE THE NO.
And second to that is:
REWRITE YOUR NOVEL. THERE IS LOVE AND FULFILLMENT THERE THAT ONLY IT CAN GIVE YOU. YOU CAN DO IT. MAKE. THE.TIME.
You see how these two voices go hand-in-hand.
For now…that’s all.
If I want to get to the novel, I have to finish the other things I’ve committed to. I can do it. So let’s do it, V. Get it done, and then push forward on the road of those dreams you know you can achieve.