Do you ever do this? See a ‘best-before’ date on food and think about what you’ll be doing on that date? You do?! So I was making the kid’s lunches this morning and I noticed that the best-before date on the pita bread do-hickey was the date of my TedX-CK talk. My stomach immediately lurched into my knees. Indeed, this talk that was first introduced in my world over 8 months ago is happening in less than 7 days!
I’ve been studying my speech every day. I carry it with me hoping that osmosis-ly it will seep into my brain. So far the most challenging part of this TedX talk, for me, has been having to memorize it. The kids have been super great in helping me. Last night, Miller and I sat in bed practising. She holds the cards. I recite what’s written. We laughed a lot at the way I jumble the words or quite maddeningly forget them. But, all of this process is working somehow. I got several high-fives and a ‘Mom, you’re gonna be amazing,’ from Miller and that, my friends, gave me the courage I need.
Earlier in the week, I was a mess. I was in my ‘I -can’t-do-this’ stage of preparing. I was having nightmares of me falling on stage and totally forgetting everything…stumbling off in a shriek of tears of embarrassment. S’alright. This is always part of my process. I’m glad I moved through it. I think that Time is helping with this. I can’t stay in this place of ‘you’re not good enough’ – that story is old hat. And, this part of my process is precisely what I’m talking about shifting in the talk I’m giving. So, I am taking my own medicine, as they say.
Today I am home alone. I’ve had a cup off coffee and egg bread toasted with butter and Jiff peanut butter. Oof. Yes, all that has put my heart in quite a beating. I haven’t had bread for breakfast in weeks, I tell you! But, I wanted the comfort of it. I watched the third episode of Alias Grace. It’s quite a striking show. And, now I’m sitting on the sofa writing to you…while this guy does this:
Sweet, fluffy Oscar gettin’ up in my grill. Gosh, he’s the best. (Did I mention we’re getting another one?A female we’re calling Pages.)
When I’m not practising my speech, I’m working on this:
You betcha – I FINISHED REVISING MY NOVEL. Oh, I’m having such utter fun reading it over! I got it printed and spiral bound so I could read it like a real novel – from beginning to end. I’m finding some typos, but mostly getting grand ideas for book two – which I hope to begin writing after my TedX. It’s funny, I’m reading it and thinking who wrote this? It’s great! Is that weird? Anyway, I’m really enjoying the whole process, and will get to query-ing post Tedx.
Yes, life has become ‘pre’ and ‘post’ TedX!
I’m nervous. I will be on the day too. But, my mantra is:
SHARE YOUR STORY, V.
It’s much better than earlier in the week when all the voices in my head were opera-ing: you can’t do this.
Yep. Done with that.
So, today…I do a bit of business for some upcoming events, then I stand tall and practice my speech to Oscar. He’s a great listener.
Here is all the info about the TedX in Chatham Kent.
Here is all the info about my upcoming events.
Life is full and busy and…I’m doing a TedX talk, people! Can I get a squeeee UP IN HERE?